I'm in the process of realizing that there are a few things in my life that have become ... well ... toxic for me. One is a lifestyle choice and the other is a friendship.
It's amazing to me that I've struggled with both of these "things" for a long, long time now. Both have given me a somewhat uncomfortable feeling inside whenever I allow myself to come face to face with their ugliness, yet I haven't known how to deal with them. I wanted to make what I knew were necessary changes -- but I didn't know how. I didn't want to create anxiety for anyone else that might be affected by my decisions and for whatever reason, the timing just didn't feel right.
Recently, it's become apparent to me that both of these particular problem areas have kind of worked themselves out -- without any assistance on my end. It just happened.
"God's timing" as a friend said to me. And oh, she is so right.
Ultimately, I didn't really need to do anything except acknowledge that what was once a part of my life no longer had a stranglehold on me, was no longer significant, no longer mattered to me one way or another. It didn't take any effort on my part. I simply knew it was time to let go.
And I believe I have been able to do just that. Effortlessly. Without worry. Without sadness. Peacefully. Content that these changes are what is best for me.
The freedom that comes from the release is just ... exhilirating.
Thank You sweet Jesus ... for your perfect timing. For knowing me better than I know myself. For keeping me in your care and comfort during the struggle. And for being with me as I rejoice in my newfound freedom.
The LORD will keep you from all harm — he will watch over your life. -- Psalm 121:7
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2 weeks ago
I don't know how old you are, but one of the greatest gifts of aging has been learning which things/people deserved rent-free space in my heart and which do not. And the other half of that? Realizing that in some toxic relationships, we are as much a part of the poison as the other person!
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